Humor

 

What better way to show your fun-loving side than with a humorous sign that says it all? 

 

 

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

A day without sunshine is like…night.

A journey of a thousand miles starts with an argument over how to pack the car.

A single fact can spoil a good argument.

Always try to be modest – and be proud of it. 

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

Deadline for all Complaints was Yesterday

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

Ham & Eggs:  A day’s work for the chicken, a lifetime commitment for the pig

He who laughs last, thinks slowest

He who laughs, lasts.

I don’t repeat gossip, so listen closely

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

I only feel stress at two times...day and night.

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges…

If the shoe fits...buy it in every color.

If you are grouchy, irritable, or just plain mean, there will be a $10 charge for putting up with you.

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

Laugh and the World Laughs with You

Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first.

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.

Never, but Never, Question the Engineer’s Judgment (choose profession)

Normal is Just a Setting on the Dryer.

Quantum Mechanics:  The dreams stuff is made of.

She who laughs, lasts.

Success always occurs in private and failure in full view.

The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

The Rooster crows, but the Hen delivers the goods.

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

Two wrongs are only the beginning.

Veni, Vedi, Visa:  I came. I saw. I shopped.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Young at Heart, Slightly Older in Other Places